Ready for love? What You Need To Know And Do To Find a Life Partner
They say that love is a decision. You decide to be open emotionally, commit and invest in the other person. But, is it really that simple? People who’ve been struggling to find a life partner might argue against this statement. That’s because they’ve been burned in the past so they’ve practically given up. But, if you consider the alternative, that is being single for the rest of your life, are you willing to give up on finding lasting love? Of course, the answer is a definitive no. So, let’s dive deeper into the process of finding the perfect life partner.
Recognize your patterns
Take a look at your previous relationships, both short-term and long term ones. Can you see the pattern, because there is probably one? The reason people struggle to find love is that they constantly date one person. Even if your love interest went by different names, there was a similarity in all of them. In order to change your dating patterns, you need to recognise them first. Once you do, you’ll know what you usually fall for and how to change your patterns to finally fall for the right person.
Define your values
Knowing your core values can have a significant impact on your love life. If you’re happy with a For Now Partnership, then your values can be mismatched. But, if your want a For Life Partner, you need to share the same values. You’ll both make compromises in order to have a long-lasting relationship, but when you share core values, these compromises will come naturally. Write a list of things you value the most, how you want to live your life, how you want to show up for your partner, and what you expect in return, and you’ll know how to recognise a person that shares the same.
Get to know yourself
You’ve probably heard the saying – the best project you’ll ever work on is yourself. So, get to know yourself. Sign up for therapy, and dive deep into self-work which can be beneficial in the long run. Find your passions, so you’ll get o to connect with like-minded people. Take care of your body, because we won’t be given another one. To be able to enjoy doing life with someone, you first have to build a life with yourself. Be the person someone will want to date by selfishly spending time on yourself first during your single time.
Sign up for help
If you’re overwhelmed by all the choices out there, especially dating apps, you might be stuck in the concept known as the paradox of choice. In a nutshell, we have so many choices that we struggle with making a decision. This can easily happen to us if we struggle with finding love. But, we can get help tailored to our needs, life values and relationship goals when we sign up with a matchmaking agency. Even gay dating is made easier with the help of a matchmaking agency. So, if you are truly serious in your goal to find the perfect life partner, find an agency that can help.
Get out there with an open mind
Don’t just focus on the end goal, stay curious for the entire ride. In other words, enjoy the process of finding your perfect partner. As you go on dates, you’ll meet different people. Some might stay in the friend zone, some might get a second date, and some will be the textbook example of your previous patterns. But, there will also be that one person who makes you feel great. So it’s imperative to get out there with an open mind and trust the process. Step out of your old dating belief that all good people are taken, and become curious about the people you get to meet.
Measure investment, not their attractiveness
We’ve all been taken by highly attractive people, those charismatic devils that make us feel great but somehow fail to invest in the relationship. It doesn’t matter how attractive and charismatic a person is if they don’t invest in this relationship. So, before you get too excited early on, measure their investment. If they aren’t trying as hard as you are and you end up constantly making excuses for them, then, they won’t be your person.
The last piece of advice would be to value consistency over anything else. People who are consistent, who call when they say they would, who show genuine interest in your day, and offer support and respect for your choices, are the Life Partner material.